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So I had this "brilliant" idea, to force one of those computer robovoices to recite some of my lyrics

I decided to start things off with "Three Packs A Day" because it is so inane and fun

I reconstructed the words so that Mr. Robo-Voice might be able to tackle some of the "finer" points ha ha ha

I've included just a few of those tweaks - just a few - lest you think for sure that I've gone completely mad

Well, it didn't work out too good - not crazy enough - but here it is

 If the recitation doesn't start when you load the page, you might have to click the player

Oh, and if the thing does play when the page opens, I think if you hit "pause" it'll stop

It's on a loop so - well - it'll go on and on and on - maybe

 

 

 

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Like art itself in whole

Three "packs" a stunning technological wallop!

(The New York Times)

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This kind of output illustrates perfectly why The Chronicle

maintains that it is noble to shun and otherwises reject - socially or functionally - nearly of what did not regurgitate from Syllibus Hoi - Universitus Palloi, without which there could not

  have been what is now known as A Reconstruction of

The Joneses and the resultant battering of

Knowledge Without Rote, previously "native comprehension" that was supposedly mystically valid. We know now, of course, that Rote Is Right.

Likewise, this newspaper stands by its principled ignorance of anyone's anything that could never pass the smell test of approval from a New Snobbery that until The Turning could not have found expression.

The Joneses may now drench themselves in gold (or hide it all in order to maintain their long nurtured beatnik fascade which seems to legitimize their playing for cash to The Joneses (who can afford it) thru skyrocketing advertising rates. Now, having won the first right they can turn to The Religion Of Material Success which provides for a Heavenly Endowed enjoyment which urges flaunting ait all by wearing it as if it were brass. What a bunch of crap this is!

(The Austin Chronicle)

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JUDGE FOR YOURSELF!

 

CLICK IT TO PLAY IT

OR TO SHUT IT UP

 

 

You may or may not share with others

a conclusion such as this:

"There's probably a ton of other

and better ways to waste time around here"

Hell yeah there are!

And that is where you should be

heading off to next.

Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah!

Please do someone stupid for me.

 

 

 

THREE PACKS A DAY

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All I need in the morning is a cigarette, a cigarette, a cigarette;

a smoke after breakfast, a smoke after sex.

It's one of the better things that can be put bee-tween lips;

Could it be better than, tit, or teet?

Note: The robot voice can't say what spells tee–eye–tee. Oh me. Oh my.

Back to the subject though:

Could three packs be better than, say, dee-eye-see-kay dick?

Maybe yah - Maybe nah.

 


Three three three three three Packs a Day. Wish I could light one up here in my brain.

Three three three three three Packs a Day; if eye do not some oak I'll go cray-zee hey hey!

 

When I was a kid I smoked before school. I Smoked when they said it was against a rule.

I smoked in the bathtub and I smoked playing pool.

The morning air? The morning air? Morning air is best when you inhale it with a Kool.

 


Three three three three three Packs a Day. Wish I could light one up here in my brain.

Three three three three three Packs a Day; if eye do not some oak I'll go cray-zee hey hey!

 

 

Some say smoking has ruined my voice. Some say I'm smoking against my choice. I'd rather be smoking than playing with toys; three packs a day since I was a little boy! Three packs a day has me all-over come. Do you wanna come over and play house with me? I am jumping, and cumming, with Joy.

 

Three three three three three Packs a Day. Wish I could light one up here in my brain.

Three three three three three Packs a Day; if eye do not some oak I'll go cray-zee hey hey

...

Written by All-in Black and Chrisswing wiith a puff or two from the Teen Challenge, Annie

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Copyright 1979 and Two Thousand Eleven by The Fam-ill-ee Fun Entertain-a-mint Group

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Adapted for thee aige by Mister Wing and performed by Alex Eye Mac Ten point six point seven

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Adios    Adieu    Aloha    Shalom

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